psm 77 & ecc 9

psm of asaph.
-he starts the psalm in deep distress, calling out to God but not being comforted. why not? where is God? isn't He supposed to respond?
-he doesn't "hear" from God so he continues to be in distress, groans, muses, cannot close his eyes, and struggles with this internal conflict... this causes him to think deeply, meditate, and confront certain thoughts and doubts on his mind and heart. maybe he wouldnt have confronted them if it wasnt for that "wrestling" period he had to go through while God was being "silent."
-he ends up being very honest and blunt about his doubts and questions about God's character. "will the Lord reject forever? will he never show his favor? has his unfailing love vanished forever? has his promise failed for all time? has God forgotten to be merciful? has he in anger withheld his compassion?" "what the heck is going on God?!" is my interpretation of how he feels. frustrated, alone, confused about who God is bc his circumstances imply that God is not good to him.
-THEN there is a break, a pause in the psalm. "Selah". it is known that "selah" happens during a psalm when the person pauses to think, meditate.
-right after the selah, the psalmist's attitude completely changes! and how does it change? not just magically... but the psalmist makes a DECISION. and ACTIVE CHOICE. he decided to "remember." remember God's goodness and faithfulness of the past and all of His demonstrations of power. he CHOOSES to reflect and remember and BELIEVE in how good God is.
-THEN he decides to PROCLAIM who God is in full-out faith now. He proclaims the character of God, in all his power and glory and goodness.

it's crazy how many psalmists change their attitude and thoughts throughout the psalm. i've read this pattern before where when you are compeltely honest and blunt with God.. confronting your doubts and questions and earnestly seeking His answers.. He will change your heart and give you the faith you need. but you need to trust Him enough to turn to him and actually GIVE him your doubts and questions.

something else that sticks out to me is that in the beginning, the psalmist is upset bc God is not "answering" him. dont we feel like that a lot? where God seems "silent"? especially when we're confused or stressed or questioning... he seems so quiet. and then we think, God where the heck are you??? BUT it's so funny how God perhaps wants us to WAIT for his response sometimes. He definitely will respond, but soemtimes we need to wait for it. why does He not respond right away? because he wants our hearts to be in the right place first.. like with this psalmist, he was upset and when he didnt get teh quick easy "comfort" fix from God.. it made him actually THINK deeply and meditate. how rarely do we do that? sometimes we never really think and never confront our heart issues unless God forces us to. so here is the psalmist, forced to start confronting his deep doubts about God.. so taht God could respond when the psalmist has revealed his true heart condition. what a perfect time for God to intervene! God's timing is perfect. He will always answer in HIS perfect timing.